Life Skills: Embracing Uncertainty
Plans – don’t we all like to make them? During this pandemic, a friend of mine mentioned how tough it was on her precisely because she couldn’t make any plans; everything up in the air, not knowing how things could change at a moment’s notice.
The way I see it, making plans allows us to organize our mind and creates a sense of comfort in the predictability of the events to follow. We have an idea of what’s to come, so we can prepare and feel a sense of security, of control. But what happens on those days where we have no plans or our plans don’t go the way we imagined? Here’s a list from my own experience:
Having no plans would make me feel:
- Restless and confined
- Isolated, like I have no friends
- In a state of stagnation
- Unaccomplished
When plans wouldn’t go my way:
- Blocked, clammed up
- Inner tension
- Frustration, anger, disappointment
- Throw a tantrum
- Continue brewing in negativity, unwilling to accept the situation as is
I can bet you that these moments occur in our lives much more often than we realize, as we’ve unconsciously accumulated so many ideas about how the world works and how life should be. So how do we constructively manage our thoughts, feelings, and behaviour when events occur that are simply out of our control?
In my opinion, it’s essential to learn how to let go of expectations and to practice fluidity. We must learn to embrace uncertainty. Yes, definitely easier said than done. But today, I share with you a few practical ways that can help remind us that life is unpredictable and that no matter how many plans we make, things are inevitably subject to change:
Close our eyes
This helps shut out stimuli and encourages us to go inwards.
Come back to our breathing
Fight the urge to throw a tantrum. If we lose control, then so be it, but at some point, we must come back to our breath. Focus on breathing deeply and feeling our breath as it moves in, out and around our nasal cavities, our lungs, belly.
Feel our body
Feel our feet on the ground, the weight of our bottom in our chair, the blood flowing down to the tips of our fingers. This is the process known as grounding. Do anything that reminds us that we are in our body. Put our hands on our chest, our belly, or gently cradle our neck. Brush down different parts of our body, tap them, or wiggle them around! If moving helps bring us back to our body, then move, dance.
Once we can connect our mind to our physical body, there is a tranquility that overtakes our rampant thoughts. We are somehow reminded of our inner strength and our ability to keep going. Only if we can make space for curiosity and an openness to the possibilities, there is an opportunity for the most magical things to come into our experience.
After all, and I’m sure we’ve all heard it before, the only constant in life is change. When we learn to stop resisting and accept uncertainty, our lives become fuller, richer, and more peaceful.
